Shareholder #1: The company is
currently lacking in capable executives to run its operations. The training and
re-skilling budget for employees is being cut this year. Why?
CEO: We from the higher
management find that we don’t need capable executives to run the company. We
just need executives that are submissive and loyal to the company’s higher
management in order to keep the company afloat. Less so-called smart ideas more
work can be done.
Shareholder #2: There has been a
lot of complaint from the employees that the company does not provide adequate
transportation allowances to cover their daily commute. Why?
CEO: We from the higher
management find that their complaints are not justified. If they can’t afford
the fuel price, take public transportations. If that is troublesome, they
should wake up early and travel on roads that are free from toll charges.
Better still, they can even ride a bicycle or walk to work. Look at the
Europeans.
Shareholder #1: The company’s
cafeteria is selling food with exorbitant prices. I just got normal fried rice
just now and was charged a bomb for it. Won’t the employees complain?
CEO: We from the higher
management find that the price is justified based on the economy outlook. If
the employees can’t afford the food, they can always pack from home or bring
some raw meat to cook at the office. We have just signed a deal with Cronies
Ltd to provide state of the art cooking utensils in the pantries.
Shareholder #3: We don’t quite
understand some transactions in the company’s Yearly Financial Records. There
is a payment of approximately billions into a personal account for some
services rendered. However it is not clear what those services are and who the
vendor is.
CEO: Security, please remove Shareholder
#3 from the premises for asking stupid questions.
Shareholder #1: There is a plus
point we can see that the operating expenses has decreased immensely. Seems
that this is largely due to the annual increment and bonus payout remains nil
for 3 consecutive years. Will this affect employees’ morale and subsequently
affect productivity?
CEO: We from the higher
management find that this is totally a non-issue. We have instructed HR to
provide counseling to the employees at a monthly basis and tell them that if
the earning is not sufficient they can always get a second job or sell some of
their personal belongings online to make ends meet. We have just signed a
contract with MyBrother Ltd to provide internet training to assist them.
Shareholder #3: What the heck is
the company’s direction to increase profitability and compete effectively in
the global market?
CEO: Security, why is this
troublemaker still in the premises. Call the police and ask them to send the
Chief of Police here personally to escort him out. By the way, the meeting has
come to an end as I am late for a golf session with the President of Utopia. I
will hand over to my deputy to close the meeting.
Deputy CEO: Everyone please
leave. On your way out please collect a document notifying that the company
plans to buy 2 private jets for the CEO and his immediate family members’
business usage. Thank you all for coming and please continue to vote us into
the higher management and do hold on to our under-valued company share.
